Asking For Help

Asking for help doesn't always mean you get what you think is right for you, but it sets the wheels in motion.

In 2013 my body and mind had reached a breaking point.  My chronic spine pain was not responding to the medications my doctor had me on.  I had moved, and was finally seeing a pain management physician, but the medications were not effective.  Combined with the other symptoms of anxiety, severe insomnia, rapid heart rate, brain fog and the fact I was in an abusive relationship, it was all too much to bear.

I needed help and got a referral to a place they assured me would help with the mental issues, and said they would also help with the insomnia and my pain. That was a tall order but I was desperate.   

I entered the facility with mixed emotions.  From the start I was unsure if I belonged there, many patients were there for substance abuse issues.  A couple patients were there for mental by disorders so I decided to stay and get some help.  Surely they would help me with my severe insomnia.

I didn't see a doctor right away and was given Vistaril for sleep.  Vistaril is an antihistamine and anti-emetic with properties that can make you drowsy.  I didn't need drowsy, I needed a hammer to knock me out!  I told them the drug name that I took at home and asked if they could increase it.  They were no help and I laid in bed at night just like at home, staring at the ceiling.  I thought, heck I could do this at home in my comfy bed!  

Meanwhile, my anxiety was through the roof, my heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest.  I had major brain fog and sat through the group sessions not caring or really understanding what anyone was saying.

One day, I felt like I was going to blow up with all the symptoms reaching a breaking point.  I told the nurse I needed to go to the hospital, and when I got there, I saw an ER doctor that ordered a thyroid Ultrasound.  My confused mind didn't understand why, but I went along with it.  

Three days later she called me at home.  "Shauna, you have 4 masses on your thyroid, one quite large, I cannot rule out carcinoma at this time; you need to get to a specialist right away!"  She was my Angel in a lab coat. 

Next:  Thyroid biopsy and Total Thyroidectomy...                  

  

Gentle Hugs....and a tolerable pain day.

Searching For An Answer...is it Thyroid Cancer?

Getting my diagnosis of Thyroid Cancer took unneeded time, and valuable years of my life.  Looking back, there was evidence from a CT scan done in 2011 that certainly should have been utilized.  I was not diagnosed with Thyroid Cancer until 2014.   

That scan is referenced here, in a post titled: A Jawdropping CT Scan.   This was a thoracic spine study which incidentally showed a mass on my thyroid-- which was ignored by the ordering physician; ignored like many other issues he should have acted on.  I didn't know about the mass until I got a copy of the scan much later.  That doctor made some big mistakes in my care.  That scan should have had him immediately send me to two specialists: an Endocrinologist and a Pain Management doctor, as he was prescribing my medication, which was ineffective.  I was pleading with him to refer me to a pain doctor, as he knew I would not have anymore spine surgeries, and I was also very interested in the intrathecal pain pump.  That all starts with seeing a pain management physician.  His office was not known for timely referrals, or in my case, a referral at all.  

Those 3-4 years between a mass first seen on my thyroid, and getting a cancer diagnosis, were very tough times.  I had severe insomnia, unable to sleep for three months, after staring at the ceiling all night, sleeping on the couch because my boyfriend snored something horrible (and was abusive) I sometimes caught a quick nap as it neared early morning, then being awoken by his alarm, it was impossible to go back to sleep.  I was absolutely dragging through each day.  

I had a rapid heart rate which presented itself on my shirt-- moving with each beat, it was so strong.  That heart rate contributed to feeling extremely anxious during those 3 months of no sleep.  That kind of insomnia is akin to what is done during prisoner torture--keeping a person from sleeping for weeks, months at a time.  It makes you feel like you are going crazy; it causes psychosis.  

Brain fog followed right along.  Mix all of those symptoms up and I was a candidate for the psychiatric department like so many misdiagnosed thyroid patients.  Untreated thyroid disorders can mimic mental health symptoms.

I showed as 'euthyroid' in thyroid blood work, which is normal levels.  So anytime I was tested for thyroid disease, it was all normal, yet I had cancer growing in 2 of the 4 masses on my thyroid.  I came to learn that doctors can not rely on blood tests alone for finding disease in the thyroid.  I was a perfect example of that.  

I fought for my own health.  I took the initiative to press on about how I felt, my symptoms, the need to find out what was wrong with me.  Then my angel showed up.  God made sure I  wasn't alone in my fight, in finding out what was happening to me.

Next: Asking for help....An Angel showed up..

   

Gentle Hugs....and a tolerable pain day